This past year has been a rough year. I mean so many things but I recognize today that I have more appreciation of where I am today because of yesterday. The struggles were necessary to help me grow, I see this now. I have more appreciation of my family and friends who saw me through this period of my life!!
I am approaching my 35th birthday. At the beginning of each October, I start a process of some sort on working on me and preparing for my New Year (my birthday). So this year I found 20 questions on the 5th of October, and decided I would answer them each day. I am working on me. I am journaling and trying to work on the best parts of me, but also acknowledging the negative parts.
So my last blog I wrote about trying to make changes. Well instead of immediately working on the outside first, I am going on the inside. I was surprised to discover a lot of anger I have been holding on to throughout my adult life. In holding on to this anger, I realize that I have not been as authentic as I believed I had been. I was angry at a variety of things, people, and events, but most of all I realized I was angry at myself. So I wrote, cried, and let it go. I felt so much lighter from the journaling. I continue to journal each day answering questions each day I have found online.
So as I am on this healing process to entering my 35th year of life, anew, I am amazed at how I (we) can continue to grow so much (even thought I knew this, its good to be reminded of this fact). I appreciate the lessons that are occurring. I mean, I feel lighter as I deal with the in depth things sitting on my soul. I am happy to share that I recognize now, that I have been pushing others to work hard, do well, take care of self, but with that I failed to practice what I preach. I have been so focused on others, that I failed to do the same for me.
So this month I have truly been taking care of me, truly looking within and pulling out the crap while embracing the blessings. I am looking forward to this birthday because I feel more authentic now than I have in a long time. With each question I am laughing a little harder, smiling much broader, and feeling like the old me with a new twist!!!
I know this will be a good birthday, because I am genuinely celebrating me!!!!! So Happy Birthday to Me!!!!!!!
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