So recently, since working two jobs and stressing. I went on a junk food and soda kick. Suddenly my pants were fitting tighter then usual and a few pair not at all. I avoided the scale. I would not admit. Then one day looking in the mirror, I found it. That loathing, muffin top, that lovely extra fat that sits on top of your pants for everyone to see. That piece of meet that makes one look like they are going to pop at any time. Now I have been exercising, but not consistently like I know I need to but I haven't see anything like that on me before in my life. I mean, even at my heaviest I did not have it. Now I am still smaller then I was after my daughter, but being skinny with it makes it even more obvious, so I believe. How many times, did I look at other women and think, not me, well its me...yes, I am the lady in jeans with the lovely meat hanging over....YIKES!!!!!!!
Yes, I look down and seeing that once cute shirt is revealing all of my secrets of too many donuts, not enough sit ups. I don't really want to exercise to get rid of it, I am use to just it not being theire. Age, lovely companion is telling me that my father's genes are catching up with me. Man I am a little disappointed, at that evil mirror, and what I see. But the mirror does not lie and I can no longer lie to myself. So I brave the scale, and WTF!!! 10 pounds, is that possible. Well again the mirror from behind is telling me it is so, (is taht muffin top or is my butt hanging over?).
My daughter hears me say, "I'm fat." Now as a therapist one should never make negative comments about themselves in front of their child, but she caught me and yes she lectures me that I am not fat!! Well I tell her that if I say it then I must be willing to do something about it also.
So what to do, well first. I am not wearing the shirts that tell my little secret (well its no secret now). Then I am eating healthier and have cut sodas down (only when I eat out and during trainings!!). NOW.....I must exercise (AAAAAHHHHhhhhhh!!). I am not young and those days where I coud lay around and not worry about weight are gone.
So that dreaded reflection in the mirror, I plan to get rid of her, and get back to me. So I am open to all suggestions to get back on track!!! I know I am not the only person out there going through this lovely stage in life!!!
